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HPoobomber’s 2009 Oscar Winning Picks:I

Written by God on Friday, January 23, 2009 — 10 Comments

Best Picture: I don’t care.

Best Actor: Who gives a rat’s ass.

Best Actress: I care as much as I do about Oprah.

Best Art Director For A Coming-of-Age Film Entirely Set In Islamabad: Right.

Best Best Boy: Uhm hmmm.

Best Cinematic Pissantry: All of them.

Best Film Where a Dead Actor Is A Crazy Fuck: Yawn.

Best Use of Bullet-Time: Boo, hiss.

Best Film By A Coppola: Snore.

Best Sound: Oh dear God, let it be a tragic movie where we hear teardrops falling.

Best Everything: None.

Best Movie That Sucked But People Think It’s Oscar Worthy Because it Sucked: Every single one.

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10 Comments to “Poobomber’s 2009 Oscar Winning Picks:”

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  1. Cora's Gravatar Cora
    Friday, January 23, 2009 at 8:56 PM | Permalink

    Well, someone’s in a good mood, eh?

  2. Cora's Gravatar Cora
    Friday, January 23, 2009 at 8:56 PM | Permalink

    :-)

  3. leonesse's Gravatar leonesse
    Friday, January 23, 2009 at 9:13 PM | Permalink

    Seen any good movies lately?

    Lovin’ the new digs.

  4. MJenks's Gravatar MJenks
    Friday, January 23, 2009 at 11:34 PM | Permalink

    Best actress: Kate Winslet’s breasts.

    Actually…they should be nominated for everything. Best sounds, best jublies, best things for Matt to put his head between and shake back and forth, best target practice.

    I could go on and on, but I seem to be spent and going flaccid now.

  5. MJenks's Gravatar MJenks
    Friday, January 23, 2009 at 11:43 PM | Permalink

    Hi, me again.

    Thought I’d add that you could take my comment from above and change “Kate Winslet’s” to “Kate Beckinsale’s” and “breasts” to “ass”.

    Thanks. I’d go on some more, but flaccidity is once again setting in. Might be permanent until the morning. Not as young as I used to be, you know.

  6. Giggle Pixie's Gravatar Giggle Pixie
    Saturday, January 24, 2009 at 10:40 AM | Permalink

    Dude, my sentiments EXACTLY.

  7. justeasier's Gravatar justeasier
    Saturday, January 24, 2009 at 7:06 PM | Permalink

    I didn’t know you liked Oprah!!

  8. mjenks's Gravatar mjenks
    Monday, January 26, 2009 at 12:06 PM | Permalink

    Hi, me once more.

    If you could look at the previous comment and plug in the words “Kate Blanchette’s” in place of either “Beckinsale” or “Winslet” and “legs” in place of either “breasts” or “ass.”

    Thanks. Returning to flaccidity now.

  9. Fancy's Gravatar Fancy
    Monday, January 26, 2009 at 1:30 PM | Permalink

    Wow, tell us how you really feel…

  10. Dog Breath's Gravatar Dog Breath
    Tuesday, January 27, 2009 at 4:55 PM | Permalink

    Kate Beckinsale for best actress in a still picture!

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