From: gwb100@hotmail.com (Georgie Bush)
Sent: December 23, 2009 6:15 AM
To: DAN
Subject: SUP???
HEY MAN
SO ME N LAURA WAS SITTING AROUND THE KICHEN TABLE LAST NITE AND SHE SAYS
GEORGE GET OUT OF THE HOUSE YOU ARE DRIVING ME CRAYZ RITE A BOOK OR GO FOR A DRIVE OR SOMETHING
I SHOWD HER!!!!11 IM IN ALBURQWERTY NEW MEXICO IN A HOTEL ROOM HERE AND WRITING THIS NOW HAHAHA!!11 GESS WAT DUDE??? IM ON MY WAY TO THE PORT OF LOS ANGELAS AND GOT ME A JOB ON A OIL TANKER!1!!! YEEHAW!
I JUST GOT IN MY CAR AND DROVE AND DORVE AND DROVE RITE THROUGH TEXAS AND I THINK I PASSED THRU FRANCE AND ENDED UP HERE IN NEW MEXICO! IT A LOT LIKE OLD MEXICO EXCEPT HERE THERE ARE AMERICANS .
THEN I THOT WELL HECK I SHOLD JUST KEEP GOING AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS AND HERE I AM NOW! LAURA TRYED CALLIN ME ON MY CELL PHONE BUT IF FORGOT MY CHARGER AND DIDNT ANSER BECAUSE I THOT SHED BE ALL CRYIN AND SAD AND STUFF AND WERES MY GEORGIE I NEED HIS LOVIN TONITE AND THAT WOULD KILL MY BATTERNIES PRETTY QUICK AND I MITE NEED THEM.
DID U KNOW THERE IS A AIR FORCE BASE HERE??? ITS CALLED KIRKLAND OR KURTLAND OR SOMETHING BUT THEY WOULDNT LET ME IN FOR SOME REASON . I WANTED TO JUST FLY THE REST OF THE WAY TO LA ON A FREE PLANE BUT NOPE NO GO PARDNER. SO I GESS IM MAKING A RODE TRIP.
IN OTHER NEWS I GAVE UP ON MONOSYLLABLES OR WHATEVER THAT THING IS CALLED WHERE YOU ONLY SLEEP WITH YOUR WIFE AND YOUR SECRENTARY OF STATE. YUP ITS TRUE I JUST FINISHED HAVING SEXAUL RELAYSHUNS WITH A APACHE CHICK . SCREW LAURNA AND STUFF IM EXPERIENCING ALL THIS WORLD HAS TO OFFER I JUST DECIDED RITE NOW. !!!! COCAIN IS BACK IN TOWN BABY!11!! AND IM HALF DRUNK TOO RITE NOW HAHAHA!!11
ANYWAYS ID BETTER GET RID OF THIS CHICK SOMEHOW MAYBE SHE WANTS BREAKFARST AND I CAN DITCH HER AT THE FRONTEIR RESTAURANT OVER A OMELTE AND COFFEE??/ HEY HOW DO U SAY “HURRY UP AND GO TO THE BATHROOM ALREADY CHICK” IN APARCHE???
ALRIGHT ID BETTER GET RUNNIN SHES STARTING TO WAKE UP AND I NEED TO WASH MY LONGHORN AND PACK THE BAGS BEFORE SHE STARTS ASKING QUESTIONS.
TTYL DUDE!!1
Yes, Dubya, he’s a class act all the way.
I bet I could make him cry too.
Aaaaahhhh! The Frontier! The. Best. Cinnamon. Rolls. Ever!!!
When he says “Longhorn” does he mean his penis?
Maybe he will drive from coast to coast drinking and coking and whoring like Forrest Gump but with more fun.
If I were George Bush, and in such good physical shape, I’d want to spray (I’m an optimist) my wild oats, too!
But where’s the Secret Service in all of this? You know what would be cool? Well then I’ll tell you! GWB should make his Secret Service detail dress like Hell’s Angels. Or Pirates of the Caribbean! Or in Disney World character suits! They could have the outfits fitted with A/C and Uzi ports and stinger missles, grenade launchers, radar, pop tarts, etc. And their code names should be Mickey, Goofy, Pluto, Capt. Hook, but assigned to a different character to confuse the enemy!
I hope George makes it to the coast in time for the Oscars because I’d love to hear his take of the Angelina Jolie’s decolletage. Or as Desmond Morris put it, “The imitation of the cleft between the buttocks.”
GWB, coming soon to a town near you.
Lock up your daughters and all your coke/alcohol!!!
At work I am surrounded by Bush supporters. Deal with THAT for 9 hours a day.
Poo…..I’ve come to the conclusion that you have a minor man-crush on GWB. Go ahead….admit it. I’ll stand by you (long enough to laugh and get the hell away from you)
LMAO… ALBURQWERTY is my favorite. Ha ha… I’m glad to see the GWB emails haven’t stopped just because he’s no unemployed
See, I’m not the only one who thinks you’re crushing on the W. Is it his “Longhorn”?