Sure, I’m a day late, but screw it. Here’s a list of things I love most about America:
The southwest.
Florida. (For humour purposes.)
Rock star scientists (who make my life better through nuclear reactions n’ stuff).
Music. (And hair.)
Cheap plastics. And the things made with cheap plastics. (Like Turtle-B-Gone strips.)
North Korea.
South Park. (And licking the tears of the unfortunate.)
Awesome American people. (Okay, not Billy Mitchell.)
I fear it has been a while since you visited with your North American brethren just to your south. A few things have changed a bit over the years – just as freaky and amusing mind you, only different. You are surely welcome to cross the border anytime to catch up…well, more so under the cover of darkness using an assumed name I suppose.
Cheers
I’m retro like that.
Overrun with turtles. stop.
Please send immediately Turtle-B-Gone strips. stop.
They are inside the perimeter wire. stop.
Tell my wife I love her. stop.
This conversation took place over several days. Skyler’s dad is a lazy SOB.
Hey tuttle, there called TASTE BUDS, use them!
Stupid fucking turtles.