>Category Archives:
Topical Ointment
#ICANN – bringing hope.com and porn.com to a whole new global audience!#
So the internet is poised to allow non-latin characters for domain names in mid-November. What does this mean for you? It means a whole new wave of spam for http://www.???.com. Oh shit, you probably have no idea what that means, do you? (Hell, neither do I.) While us latin-y people are grumbling about how it’s [...]
#H1N1#
Yesterday the government released the H1N1 vaccine (H1N1 = HINI, right? Hiney!) onto the local masses and have encouraged everyone to go and get it, despite not providing any real reason to go and get it. People have been lining up at the gates to receive their shots, which isn’t surprising to me seeing as [...]
#Windows 7 Preview#
Well folks, tomorrow’s the big day – Windows 7 is going to be released, and I bet you’ve all been waiting for this motherfucker for months now, right? I know *I* have, and here’s a list of features why I’ll be out in front of Best Buy tommorrow morning in my snowsuit and nipple tassels [...]
#Balloon Boy#
Q: What do you get when you cross Jon and Kate Plus 8 with the ‘balloon boy‘? A: I don’t know, but I wish Jon and Kate would go up in a similar balloon and it’d somehow crash or they’d fall out and die or something. Kidding, I don’t want them to die. Kidding about [...]
#My Interview With Maxim Magazine About David Letterman#
Yesterday I was interviewed by Maxim Magazine regarding my thoughts about the alleged blackmail attempt of David Letterman, and the whole scandal where David Letterman was actually having sex. Here are some transcripts from the interview: Maxim Magazine: What do you think about David Letterman coming out in broad daylight to confront the accusations that [...]
#Breaking Malcolm in the Middle#
Apparently last night the Emmy awards were given out to the best actors and actresses I’ve never heard of, except for Tyler Cranberry who plays the inspirational meth-dealing father of four boys, one of which is super-smart, one is weird looking, one is as smart as a bag of hammers, and the other one is [...]
#Oh crap, Patrick Swayze’s dead! I call dibs on his legwarmers!#
Patrick …. Swayze …. is … dead. Not ‘dead’ like Rob Lowe’s, Matt Dillon’s, Tom Cruise’s, C. Thomas Howell’s, Ralph Macchio’s, or Emilio Estevez’s acting careers either. He’s really dead, Ponyboy. I’m going to try and refrain from making references to Ghost – although if Whoopie Goldberg starts acting strange on The View like she’s [...]
#Oh shit, happy nine one one Bememberance Day!#
Today is a day that will live in infamy…. that is, until something awesomely cancelley happens on this day in the future, like perhaps Jesus rises from the dead. Or descends from the Heavens? Up or down, one or the other I’d expect. He’d totally fuck me up if he moved laterally, like “Hey, Jesus [...]
#Righty righty, lefty wrongy#
Today in Samoa, the little island nation switches from driving on the right hand side of the road to driving on the left hand side of the road. (Don’t say you never learned anything here. Don’t type it, either. Seriously, I’m sensitive to your criticism.) The switch is aimed at bringing Samoa in line with [...]
#Happy Labour Day!#
Hey, happy Uterus Labour Day! You know, I’m not even certain why we celebrate giving birth on Labour Day. I mean we already have birthdays and Mother’s Day (and Father’s Day, but considering the amount of work that a father does during labour, it’s not all that big of a deal), why do we have [...]
#Top Commenters (For Whom I Reserve The Hugest Erections)#
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---Get Crackin'---
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